Judgement Eyes

Have you ever noticed when you are talking with a sales clerk and they act uncomfortable? They aren’t sure what to say when you are talking to them? Ever notice people judging you and you have no idea why?

I get judged on how I look all the time. Whether it’s my weight, hair, face, skin, or anything. Judging can go a couple different ways. Judgement can be something negative where people can think ‘that person is too skinny/fat’ or ‘that outfit does NOT look good on them’ or how about ‘their face is full of imperfections’.

Many people would voice their judgement to that person. Do you think this will help them to become a better person? Absolutely not. In fact, many people will take the judgement personally. Those comments would get under their skin and won’t stop thinking about it. This is especially difficult for people with a mental illness. I’m not saying ALL people with a mental illness would think negative. It depends on the person. I am one that suffers from depression and anxiety. When I get judged because of my weight (which is a BIG trigger for me) or my skin (which I have blemishes because of stress), I take it personally. My mind goes to a dark place. I already have an active imagination. Imagine how my mind is when I’m criticized and judged by my appearance or because of how I think. In my head my thoughts can be dark and disturbing. How we think about ourselves is how we interpret what comments are said to us. You think negative of yourself. You will take comments negatively which can affect your mentality. That is another topic I will touch base on later.

Judging can be positive. What?! Yes, you heard me. Well, you read me. By admiring someone is still judgement. But in a positive way. “I like your dress” or “I love your hair” or how about “you are handsome”. THAT’S the judgement you want to voice. Judging and voicing your judgement in a positive way will do wonders for someone’s insecurities and helps them feel better about themselves. When you make someone else feel good, how do YOU feel knowing you put a smile on their face? It boosts your mood too, right? Judging others positively is the only type of judging that I prefer. Doesn’t mean I do it all the time. Doesn’t mean I think positively all the time. But judging in a positive way can help your day and someone else’s day stink a little less.

How I see it. People judge you negatively because it’s how they see themselves. You are your own worst critic. When you judge others, you aren’t helping them you are transferring your pain to the other person. In fact, you aren’t transferring your pain you are spreading your pain and insecurities to other people. This is why we need to lift each other up. Build each other’s insecurities. Help each other become better people. Help each other to grow. Judging others doesn’t do any good. It causes more problems. But can we stop judging all together? Nope. Judgement is a part of human nature. Can we judge less and accept more? Yes, absolutely. There are times where someone may do something or act a certain way that you don’t agree with. Well, that’s how THEY are. Judging them isn’t going to change them. Voicing your judgement isn’t going to change things either. In fact, it may make the situation worse. It’s better to just not say anything at all when it comes to judging in a negative way. It won’t change anything if you voice it, so why bother voicing it in the first place?

Judgement Eyes

Judging is all around us. It’s how you handle the judgement that can either make you or break you. How you handle the judgement can help you move forward, or it can hold you back. How are you going to handle judgement? How you going to judge? In a positive way or a negative way? It’s your choice. Think about it. Think before you speak.