Relationship Anxiety

Anxiety and depression are confusing and frustrating issues. You can go from being totally fine and happy one minute and then the total opposite the next. That is what happened to me this week. I was totally “fine” all week. Sure, I was still depressed, and my anxiety would kick in but that is normal for me. When it came to Friday, that’s when my mood switched. When I got home from work, I was emotional and became angry because I had no idea what was going on or why I was so emotional. Nothing happened. The ONLY thing that would possibly even come close with be being emotional is stress. But what is the stress coming from? Work? Not really. I am just a temp for the state while someone is on medical leave. It has gotten me thinking what am I going to do when my assignment is up? Where am I going to next? But I wouldn’t think that is stressing me out. School? It was stressing me out with trying to get my final projects done. But then that class ended, and we have a week before the next class starts. So, I’m not really stressed about school. Now, that I think about it the thing that really is stressing me out is this relationship I am in.

Let me break it down for you. You know what they say. Opposites attract. Well, in this case that is so true. I am used to guys that are verbal, complimenting, romantic, says what’s on his mind, talks things out and communicates on a daily basis. Well, my guy is NOT like that. He’s not very good at communicating, complimenting, being romantic, speaking his mind and so on and so forth. I am very patient with him because he doesn’t really have experience with relationships. He does have a good heart, he is protected, and handsome (although I may be biased on that). I feel safe when I am with him. I know he doesn’t want to hurt me. He respects my boundaries. He may be a quiet guy, but his actions speak louder than his words. For the way he looks at me I know he likes me for me. But what my anxiety focuses on are things he DOESN’T say. Women like to be complimented and most like romance. well, at least I do. Because of the lack of the reassurance my mind goes to the taunting questions: Am I not good enough for him? Am I not good enough in general? Why does he do that? Am I not good enough to be romanced? Am I not good enough to be complimented? The list of questions goes on and on.

That’s the issue with anxiety. Your mind is going to go all over and think up all these false scenarios of whatever situation you are in. The anxiety will only calm down if you know how to self-talk your mind into not believing the scenarios or if you are able to get reassurance of the situation.

Just keep in mind what your mind tells you is different than what the outcome of your situation could be. There is no point in obsessing over the situations because if you do there is a chance that it would ruin what it can be. Letting it play out the way it supposes to will be more beneficial for you than if you try to control it. Just let it go and let it happen. It may not be what you want but it will be how it is supposed to be. I know you want to control the situations, trust me, I know I want to control them, but we can’t. It will drive us crazy and it will cause anxiety. That is where we learn how to control our anxiety and learn to cope with our depression. It won’t help us take control of situations, but it will help us live a calmer life.

Depression and Anxiety